This joke was sent by MerV's uncle who is a catholic. I'm surprised with his sense of humour.
A pastor entered his donkey in a race and it won.The pastor was so pleased with the donkey thathe entered it in the race again, and it won again.
The local newspaper read:
PASTOR'S ASS OUT FRONT.
The Bishop was so upset with this kind of publicitythat he ordered the pastor not to enter thedonkey in another race.
The next day, the local newspaper headline read:
BISHOP SCRATCHES PASTOR'S ASS.
This was too much for the Bishop, so he orderedthe pastor to get rid of the donkey.The pastor decided to give it to a nun in a nearbyconvent.
The local paper, hearing of the news, posted thefollowing headline the next day:
NUN HAS BEST ASS IN TOWN.
The Bishop fainted. He informed the nun that shewould have to get rid of the donkey, so she soldit to a farmer for $10.
The next day the paper read:
NUN SELLS ASS FOR $10.
This was too much for the Bishop, so he orderedthe nun to buy back the donkey and lead it to theplains where it could run wild.
The next day the headlines read:
NUN ANNOUNCES...HER ASS IS WILD AND FREE.
The Bishop was buried the next day....
The moral of the story is.... Being concerned aboutpublic opinion can bring you much grief and misery... and even shorten your life.
So BE yourself and enjoy life..... You'll be a lothappier and live longer!
Friday, July 6, 2007
Wednesday, July 4, 2007
Mat Jokes
My friend passed me this link and I knew you guys would appreciate it.
Disclaimer: I'm not racist...its just that the jokes are very funny.
If Singaporeans eat maggi mee and Indonesians eat indomee, then what do Malaysians eat?Sodomee
Where is a Malay's favourite shopping spot?
Matro
What is a Malay's favourite tv show?
Ali Matbeal
What do you call a small, cheap Malay?
Econ mini mat
What do you call a Mat bungee jumping?
Mat-Yo Yo
How do you confuse a Mat?
Put him in a circular room and ask him to relac one corner.
A Mat, who was in Primary 3, came home from school one day and asked his father, "Bapak, today in school, me and friends had competisen, see who's cock the biggest, lah. My cock bigger than all, lah. Why ah? Because I melayu, issit? The father sighed and looked at him and said, "No,lah. Because you're eighteen years old."
Three men, Ah Beng, a Chinese, Ah Neh, an Indian, and Ah Mat, a Malay, were all sentenced to terms of life imprisonment for armed robbery. Upon reaching the prison, the chief warden told them, "Since you are going to be here for a very long time, you can bring into the cell whatever you wish. Just tell me and I'll try to fulfil it."So Ah Beng asked for a lifetime supply of cigarettes so he could drown his sorrows in smoke.Ah Neh asked for a set of the Encyclopaedia Brittanica as he wanted to study his remaining life away, having never passed his PSLE.Ah Mat, however, asked for a lifetime supply of tampons. The warden was puzzled and asked, "What do you need tampons for?"Ah Mat replied: "You never hear, is it? With tampons, you can go running, cycling, swimming......"
Disclaimer: I'm not racist...its just that the jokes are very funny.
If Singaporeans eat maggi mee and Indonesians eat indomee, then what do Malaysians eat?Sodomee
Where is a Malay's favourite shopping spot?
Matro
What is a Malay's favourite tv show?
Ali Matbeal
What do you call a small, cheap Malay?
Econ mini mat
What do you call a Mat bungee jumping?
Mat-Yo Yo
How do you confuse a Mat?
Put him in a circular room and ask him to relac one corner.
A Mat, who was in Primary 3, came home from school one day and asked his father, "Bapak, today in school, me and friends had competisen, see who's cock the biggest, lah. My cock bigger than all, lah. Why ah? Because I melayu, issit? The father sighed and looked at him and said, "No,lah. Because you're eighteen years old."
Three men, Ah Beng, a Chinese, Ah Neh, an Indian, and Ah Mat, a Malay, were all sentenced to terms of life imprisonment for armed robbery. Upon reaching the prison, the chief warden told them, "Since you are going to be here for a very long time, you can bring into the cell whatever you wish. Just tell me and I'll try to fulfil it."So Ah Beng asked for a lifetime supply of cigarettes so he could drown his sorrows in smoke.Ah Neh asked for a set of the Encyclopaedia Brittanica as he wanted to study his remaining life away, having never passed his PSLE.Ah Mat, however, asked for a lifetime supply of tampons. The warden was puzzled and asked, "What do you need tampons for?"Ah Mat replied: "You never hear, is it? With tampons, you can go running, cycling, swimming......"
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